Garfield:Maximum Speed
by ShakespeareHemmingway
Summary: Garfield goes on high speed adventure!
1. Chapter 1

Garfield: Maximum Speed

It was a bright morning filled with misty joy, when Garfield awoke from slumber.

"I am Hungry." Garfield thought with hungerous glee. "I must have food or my stomach will rebel."

Jon Arbuckle was cleaning his dishes and Odie was busy practicing his fencing.

"Good morning, Garfield, did you hear? Lasagna Palace has opened!"

"Lasagna Palace? What is this Tom Foolery?!" Roared Garfield.

"Check the TV, there the truth will be revealed." Responded Jon Arbuckle.

Garfield looked at the television and saw a beautiful commercial.

"Lasagna Palace, where all of your Lasagna fantasies will become reality."

"I will go to this palace, and find my lasagna." Said Garfield.

Be careful Garfield, for I sense dangerous peril." Said Jon Arbuckle.

"I am always careful." Responded Garfield as he walked out the door.

Garfield walked down the street whistling his sweet music when a bus passed him on the road. Upon seeing the bus Garfield thought to himself. "What strangeness."

All of a sudden Garfield's cell phone leaped to life with a thrilling shriek.

"Who is this?!" Garfield sternly demanded.

"I am Howard Payne, the Lasagna Bomber!" Responded an EVIL voice.

"Pop quiz Garfield, What do you do when there is a bomb on a bus filled with innocents?!"

"What madness is this?!" Garfield bombasted.

"There is a bomb on that bus that just passed you, and if the bus goes under maximum speed, it will explode!!" Shouted the vile voice.

"Oh No! I am the only one who can save them!"

Garfield rushed to the bus and flung himself in.

"Who are you acrobatic cat?" Bellowed the bus driver.

"I am Garfield and there is a bomb on this bus, you must drive at maximum speed."

Upon seeing Garfield, a shifty man stood up and pointed a gun at Garfield.

"You will not take me Garfield! I am not going to prison, if you do not believe me then look at the point of my gun for it is not a liar." Said the man with great haste.

"Relax man, I am not here for you, whatever you did I am sure you are sorry. Here I am not a cat, we are just two cool dudes on a bus." Responded Garfield in a cooley chill voice.

The man seemed to relax but then a stupid man in football suit tried to tackle him causing him to fire at the driver who was hurt. Garfield kicked away the man's gun with furious speed.

"Stay there, crime rat." Scolded Garfield.

Garfield rushed to the driver who was hurt bad.

"My friend, your sacrifice will not be in vain, I will eat you, and your strength will be mine own." Said Garfield tenderly to the driver. And so Garfield ate the driver.

"Who will now drive the bus?!" asked Garfield.

A very pretty lady stood up.

"I will drive the bus!" She exclaimed.

"Ok get your rear into gear and get over here!" Shouted Garfield.

"What must I do?" She asked.

"You must keep the bus at MAXIMUM SPEED to avoid certain detonation." Responded Garfield. They sped along the highway at maximum speed but all was not well.

"This is too fast, if we keep going at this speed, the passengers will get sea sick!" The young woman said concernedly.

"That is a risk I am willing to take." Responded Garfield with stern determination.

A few miles ahead, Garfield saw that the road ended in a dead end right off a freeway.

"Oh no if we keep going there will be certain doom!" Said the woman.

"I know but what choice do we have?" responded Garfield.

It was then in the distance that they saw a figure. It was none other than Jon Arbuckle.

Jon Arbuckles eyes flashed with the fury of the owl.

Jon Arbuckle bent his knees and put his hands to the side while beginning to mutter some words.

energy was building in Jon Arbuckle's hands as he said the words.

"AMAKOOOOO" a blast of energy shot forth from Jon Arbuckles hands and destroyed the bus killing everyone but Garfield who cast a barrier spell in time.

"Garfield I have been looking all over for you thank goodness you are alright." Exclaimed Jon Arbuckle.

"Yes but I will have vengeance on the Lasagna bomber, and avenge those innocent passengers." Said Garfield.

Garfield shook his fist at the sun. "I WILL AVENGE YOU!!"

Garfield and Jon Arbuckle walked into the Lasagna Palace with renewed determination.

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 2

Garfield Part 2: The Magic Portal

Garfield and Jon Arbuckle entered the Lasagna Palace after their tango with the Lasagna bomber. There they saw glorius things. They saw Lasagna covered in gold silver and even brass, it was a delicious site indeed.

"Garfield look at this isnt it incredible?" Asked Jon Arbuckle.

"Yes but I need to find the counter and order before I revolt from hunger." Said Garfield.

Garfield spotted the counter and approached, but to his startlement he recognized who was behind it!

"IT IS THE LASAGNA BOMBER!" Said Garfield.

"What?!? How could you be alive?!?!" Said the Lasagna bomber, as he fled with a jogging motion.

"Why is the Lasagna bomber here?!' Demanded Jon Arbuckle.

"It is obvious he was planning to destroy the statue of liberty with Lasagna hellfire!" Responded Garfield.

"Quickly, we must follow him!" Said Garfield, following the Lasagna bomber to a back room. In the room Garfield saw the Lasagna bomber leap into a portal.

"We must follow him into the unknown land!" said Garfield, as he leaped into the portal.

"I am in your tail!" shouted Jon Arbuckle.

Out of the portal the Garfield and Jon Arbuckle arrived in front of a large building surrounded by trees.

In front of the building they saw three young youths.

"What is this place you loiterers?!" Asked Garfield with righteous fury.

" This is Hogwarts. I am Harry Potter answered a bespeckled youth, and these are my friends Hermione and Ron. We have been expecting you Garfield."

"Of course" answered Garfield. "The Lasagna Bomber must have came here to force himself on Voldemort so that they can conspire for the purposes of evil."

"Yes." Answered Harry Potter, "You must come into Hogwarts and study magic so you can battle them."

They entered Hogwarts and wandered its halls when Hermione spoke to Garfield.

"Garfield you are ruggedly handsome, will you not be my boyfriend?"

"Sorry, pussylips." Answered Garfield. "My only love is fighting and adventure."

As they trespassed the halls a young man with blonde hair approached them.

"haHA Garfield! I am Draco Malfoy, and I will not let you pass! I will defeat you in the name of the darkness!"

"Alright kid lets throw it down!" Responded Garfield.

They fought with blinding fury, exchanging blows like pumas in the jungle. Draco Malfoy used his double kick technique but Garfield countered with a shoryuken he learned from Ryu.

"Agaga!" Cried out Draco Malfoy.

"You are beaten!" Said Garfield

"I not think!" Said Draco Malfoy has he threw a lightning shock into Garfields eyes like a dirty trickster.

"My eyes you rodent!!" Shouted Garfield as he fell on the ground.

"Now you are the one who is beat!" Said Draco as he stood over Garfield.

"No fool I hope you did not eat dinner yet for it is time for a meal of lead!" Said Garfield as Garfield fired into Draco Malfoys chest with his left leg which was also a shotgun. The shot went through Draco Malfoy and set him dead.

"Garfield I did not know your left leg was a shotgun." Said Jon Arbuckle.

"Yes, I had it replaced during World War I." Responded Garfield.

"But Garfield that was a long time ago." Said Jon Arbuckle.

"No, this one was in the future." Responded Garfield.

"Come Garfield, we must teach you magic." Said Harry Potter.

"No." Said Garfield. "Magic is for women and impotents."

Than what will you do Garfield?" Asked Harry Potter.

"I will train like a man and get super strength." Responded Garfield. "I will have to train in TIMES ZERO gravity.

"TIMES ZERO GRAVITY?!" Everyone responded in unison.

"You are a mad cat, you will surely be crushed by such intense force." Said Jon Arbuckle.

"No, I am made of iron muscle now I will go into my gravity machine for training, do not disturb me." Said Garfield with fighting spirit.

"What a man." Thought Hermione.

Garfield entered his gravity chamber and prepared to train for the final combat.

To be continued…


	3. Chapter 3

Garfield part 3: Beyond Thunderdome!

Garfield was almost done training in his gravity machine doing his one handed pushups and pull ups at the same time. For his final exercise he lifted a dumbbell that weighted 1000 gigatons with one hand. After his refreshing workout he realized he had super strength and iron muscle.

"I am now ready for supreme battle." He said to himself as he emerged out of his gravity machine. Outside he saw Jon Arbuckle, Harry Potter, and the others waiting.

"Your abs are as hard as ice." Said Jon Arbuckle with impressment.

"You are like Greek god, Garfield, you are Hercules." Said Harry Potter.

"Garfield you are so manly with testosterone." Said Hermione.

"Enough chit chat we have villainy to end. Come Jon Arbuckle." Said Garfield as he hopped into his red Corvette with custom lasagna license plate.

"Garfield, we must come and help you!" Said Harry potter with concerned voice.

"Yes please let us help you." Said Hermione crying uncontrollably like a woman.

"No, this is mans work." Said Garfield with sterned rightness, because he knew he was right. Garfield than drove off with Jon Arbuckle with COOL music blaring and gave his fans a farewell thumbs up.

As Garfield drove, he and Jon and intimate talks of great emotion.

"Garfield, you cannot spend your days fighting evil and questing for adventure, you must one day find a woman to cook and clean for you so you can settle down."

"Jon Arbuckle the day I stop fighting will be the day I stop breathing. Evil has not stopped and neither do I." Said Garfield as he rubbed his most square jaw.

As Garfield Jon Arbuckle sped at near Maximum Speed down the road they noticed they were being tailgated by two wizards riding motor cycle brooms.

"Oh no Garfield! Voldemort must have sent them to foil our heroism!"

"The only thing they will foil is themselves, take wheel, Jon Arbuckle!" Exclaimed Garfield in exhilaration.

Garfield jumped on the roof of his very expensive red Corvette.

"This road is closes for construction!" Garfield shouted with heroism.

One of the biker wizards threw a Molotov cocktail at Garfields red corvette chipping some paint off.

"That is coming out of your allowances!" Shouted Garfield as he shot the villain with his pocket machine gun sending him flying to doom.

As another wizard biker approached Garfield faced him with earnest.

"I am the federal department of motorcycles and your lifecense is been revoked!!" Declared Garfield as he dropped kicked the biker wizard into oblivion.

Garfield thought he had won the battle when he heard a loud helicopter sound. A wizard driving a helicopter had appeared.

"Will this foolery not be ending?" Thought Garfield aloud to himself.

Garfield leaped like grasshopper 500 hundred miles into the air to meet the helicopter.

"I like my helicopters shaked not stirren." Said Garfield most cooley as he grabbed the helicopter and piledrived it into the ground.

Garfield returned to the drivers seat where he took helm.

"We have no lose time to spare. Lets put the pedal to the medal and go overdrive." Said Garfield fearlessly.

With those wise words, Garfield sped along to the lair of Voldemort and the Lasagna Bomber.

When Garfield and Jon Arbuckle came to the lair it was barricaded with do not enter signs and attack dogs and security guards, but it was little threat to them. They smashed their way through the steel barricades running over many evil henchmen.

Soon they entered the throne room where the lasagna bomber and voldemort were hatching evil plans.

"HAha Garfield! You are too late our plan is in the final step!" Said Voldemort.

"That is right Garfield, soon we will send lasagna bombs to the equator to destroy it killing the children with global warming!" Shouted the Lasagna Bomber outrageously.

"No, I will not let the children down they look up to me, the only equator that will be destroyed is you!" Said Garfield with justice.

" Garfield you are manly but are you manly enough to fight me alone?!" Said Voldemort.

"NO Garfield, he is using trickery!" Cried out Jon Arbuckle.

"Silence, I will fight him alone and teach him to question my manliness." Said Garfield.

Voldemort cast ultima 4 at Garfield knocking him down and pinning him.

"You are pinned!" Said Voldemort.

"Enough of this womens fighting." Said Garfield as he channeled his inner energy. As Garfield channeled his muscles grew even bigger and his shirt ripped off.

"Now I am mean business!"Scowled Garfield.

Garfield than punched right through Voldemorts magic barriers and into his chest, pulling his heart out of his evil chest.

"I will give this to the sick child needing heart transplant." Said Garfield proudly as he held the heart.

"No! I am heart broken for the second time!" Said Voldemort as he fell down to his death.

"It is your turn Lasagna Bomber! Time to pay the porpoise!" Said Garfield with roaring power.

"No Garfield it is your time to pay with dividends!" Said the Lasagna bomber as he pointed his rocket launcher at Garfields chest.

"One step close and you will be having heartburn!" Said the Lasagna bomber with wicked vengeance.

Garfield lunged forward with courage but was shot in the chest! Everyone was shocked and dismayed.

"NOOOOOOOOO." Said Jon Arbuckle in moaning agony.

"HAHA! I have won and you have lost!" Said the Lasagna bomber leeringly.

"No, villain it is you who as met the maker!" Said Garfield dramatically as he tore off his shirt to reveal a bullet proof vest!

"I will use the power of love and friendship to defeat you!" Said Garfield as he pulled out his magnum and shot the Lasagna bomber in half.

"You may have won the battle but the war is just began!" Shouted the Lasagna bombers torso as it flew into space.

With Voldemort and the Lasagna bomber beaten, their lair destroyed with force of 10 nuclear bombs. Garfield and Jon Arbuckle rode away on the open sea, pondering futures.

"The day is saved Garfield." Said Jon Arbuckle, looking into the open sea as he rode his raft.

"Yes, but for how long?" Said Garfield as he rode his custom Harley Davidson motorcycle next to Jon Arbuckle.

They both rode into the sunset, with comradery in their hearts and friendship in their minds.

The End??


End file.
